There's
Life after Divorce or Off To Divorce School
By Maia Merril Berens
From For You Magazine, Volume One, 2005
Whoever heard of Divorce School? Well, I have
a theory (shared by some pretty evolved people)
that life is a school. What I mean is, everything
that happens in life is for our learning and
personal development growth. Everything that
happens in life has many gifts and blessings.
The bigger the circumstance, the more gifts
and blessings there are for us.
If
you are reading this, it's likely that you have
"signed-up for" Divorce School. Maybe
it was recently, years ago or something you
are contemplating. Now you're freaking out!
How can she say "everything that happens
has many gifts and blessings?"
personal
devlopment growth
Didn't he cheat on me? Or, didn't he stop spending
time with me? Or, didn't he stop being the loveable
guy I fell in love with? Or, didn't he run off
with that other woman? Maybe he did.
Are
you angry at yourself because you didn't stay
true to yourself throughout this relationship?
If you keep a lousy attitude, besides a little
bitterness, at least two other things are going
to happen:
1. You will feel powerless
- very much the victim.
2. You will likely find the very same guy
again. |
Oh,
he'll have a different name and face, but later
the same things will begin happening. You could
never get involved again but you'll be left with
the yucky feelings of victim and probably just
create whatever you need to learn or heal in some
other way In other words, if we did really come
to Planet Earth to learn and grow. then there's
no getting around it. We'll just find another
situation to learn and grow in.
OK.
You think, "What do I have to lose? I'll
humor her. Now what?" There are a gazillion
workshops and teleclasses out there There are
12-Step programs for people with relationship
problems. There's Oprah, Dr. Phil and relationship
coaches and therapists. Amazon.com is filled
with self-help books from Mars and Venus
on a Date to Body Language Secrets: A Guide
During Courtship & Dating. How do you
know what to do?
Keep
it simple. Follow your intuition. If the information
makes sense; if the tools are user-friendly;
if others have used them and had success - they
are likely going to work for you.
And
here is something important to remember. Besides
being a school, life is also a journey. (Does
this woman ever stop giving us trite sayings?)
What I mean is there will be no event that says.
"Now you got it." Don't expect to
"get it right." Just enjoy and know
that life being a school means there's no failure
- only more to learn and
be blessed by.
There's
Life after Divorce or Off To Divorce School
Personal-Development-Growth
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